Ker-POW!
Isa blinked.
SNAP!
She jumped.
When was the last time she’d had a conscious thought? A week maybe?
Nied should have been here by now.
Come.
The barrage of noise continued and it sounded as if she were caught in the crossfire of a military skirmish. Every time a limb broke off the frozen form or a mighty trunk refused to flex another inch it felt as if she herself would snap. Her breaking would announce itself in the macabre chorus with a resounding whap-POW!
Move something.
She blinked again.
Were her eyes the only thing she could command?
another one from that day
Here’s a little history about the characters in mine:
Is(a) is the Norse word for the rune represented by a straight perpendicular line. It means ‘Ice’. The qualities it invokes is stagnation, stasis, unchanging. Nied is the rune with a line dissecting the upper half of a nearly perpendicular line, and it means ‘Need’. It’s about restraint and patience and waiting for change.
[...] 4, 2011 by Madison Woods The picture is posted with my story on this page. My story was improvised this morning after getting out of bed late so I apologize in advance for [...]
Here’s my contribution: http://lpssakura.wordpress.com/2011/11/04/riding-the-hoods/
Our stories seem so alike! Interesting how the mind works. But now, I want to know more…
I loved all the “sounds” in your piece. So vivid! Here’s mine. I went for the dark again–but I’m really a nice person. Honest.
http://mymusings-maggie.blogspot.com/2011/11/friday-flash-in-middle-of-nanowrimo.html
Thanks Maggie – heading your way first this morning
Ha. As I was writing the sounds, like Russel mentioned I was reminded of the comic books, especially Batman with all those noises, lol.
Hey that was a great little story! Kind of like mine, but a longer version…Well written and simply perfect.
Hey unspywriter, I read your story and really liked it. It sent a chill up my spine, and I wanted to read more. The link to leave a comment wouldn’t work, that’s why I’m posting my comment here.
Oh, no! Poor Isa. How could I forget those awful sounds – your writing brought the the frightening helplessness of those sounds back to life. Good job! And great photo prompt. I’m looking forward to reading what everybody wrote.
Here’s my link:
http://jansthoughtsovercoffee.blogspot.com/2011/11/obsession-fridayflash-fridayfictioneers.html
Glad to have you back, Jan! Your little marketing blitzkrieg this morning on Twitter and Facebook made me smile – thanks
I’ll bet all of us locals remember that ice storm and the associated sounds.
Good Morning!
neat little piece Madison – so many questions unanswered…One little thing – early in the story, the narrator “jumps” but at the end wonders if only her eyes are under her control. Now, I imagine jumping isn’t always voluntary, just found it a little jarring.
here’s mine – criticisms welcome:
http://cleveroldowl.wordpress.com/2011/11/04/friday-fictioneers-ice-storm/
Great catch Craig. I might not get a chance to change it here, but if this flash gets used for a short story or as a scene somewhere in a story I will then. So the crit is appreciated! I’ll be by your story today to see what you came up with.
Hey, Craig! I see it is your turn for a glimpse into reality and a good one at that. Perfect rendition of the family riding out the storm.
Once again, you delved into the dark space after setting up the mood, so this is actually a piece with contrasts – doom and gloom and “Wham-Pow” crackling, which lightens things for a moment until you veer into doom again!
I like it.
I also liked the prompt and feel better about my submission this week, so I hope you all like it, too. at http://fictionvictimtoo.blogspot.com/
Thanks, Laura. I can’t seem to help wading into darkness or wierd, lol. Glad you liked it. I’ll be heading your way too. Making my way down the list
Reminds me of the old Batman TV series – Bam, Pow, Clonk. These icy trees are living creatures you know. How well I remember the night of the ice storm. It was spooky, especially with no power.
Here’s mine http://russellgayer.blogspot.com/
Russel, I was thinking of the comic books when I wrote the first ‘ka-POW’, lol. They did such an effective job at giving sound to the page
And yes, the trees being living creatures is what made all those sounds so horrific to me. When it first started it did really sound like artillery crossfire in the valley. Very spooky.
[...] out Madison Wood’s blog for more 100 word flash [...]
Your story left a ton of curiosity gouging my brain for fulfillment. The imagery was great, the sense of helplessness, heavy. My only negative comment is that I found switching from 3rd person to 1st person in the last line quite jarring and I’m not sure why you did that. Am I missing something? But other than that, great job!
Here’s my humble offering: http://sweettea.kdmccrite.com/flash-fiction-3/bad-timing-flash-fiction-110411/
Uh-oh, no the POV switch was purely accidental and I *will* fix that right now. Thanks for pointing it out because I never even noticed! I think because I used to never write 3rd at all it was never an issue. But my latest have all been 3rd and I find myself slipping a lot more often. Heading to yours today, too.
Love the photo and what you did with it. She must have been hurt by one of the falling branches….
Here is mine~ http://wp.me/p1un5Q-fp 150 words about a not so restful respite.
Enjoy!
Dear Madison,
I am going to save all your 100 word stories and then find the oaks in your books that grew from the acorns you’re scattering.
I love your story and will be working on my ‘command’ while on vacation.
Aloha,
Doug
Here’s the link to my story, The Healing. http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2011/11/04/the-healing/
Doug that’s awesome imagery. Love it. Thanks
I love how it sounds as if Isa couldn’t move – “Were her eyes the only thing she could command?” seems to demonstrate this. It makes you want to know more about Isa and why she is in the frozen woods…
Here is my attempt. It was a challenge! I had it at 154 words, but managed to bring it down to 93! I kept pecking at it all morning so I thought I’d better leave it alone for now and post it…
http://mahjira.blogspot.com/2011/11/father-winter.html
I wondered if she wasn’t possessed by the ghost of Adam West, which tinted the whole thing towards humor. I enjoyed it. How would that read work for you, Madison?
As usual I’m playing #fridayflash but not fictioneer. If you want to pop over, my Friday story is a humor piece called “Demake.” http://johnwiswell.blogspot.com/2011/11/bathroom-monologue-demake.html
I don’t know… I’d have to find out who Adam West is first, LOL.
Heading your way next but it might be once I get home tonight.
[...] writing and sharing their 100-word(+/-) stories over at Madison Woods’ blog. You can check out some of their stories and even share one of your own, if you’re [...]
Hi Madison,
I’ve added 100 words in my blog post today. The one for the #FridayFictioneers is at the bottom. There’s an adult content warning on the blog and one of the flashfiction posts might trigger some raised eyebrows.
Thanks
@SiobhanMuir
http://siobhanmuir.blogspot.com
I liked the use of action words! The last one made me flinch when I realized what was going on, so they had a neat effect.
My story’s called “Just There”, linked above.
It’s my first flash fiction! Ever! It’s here: http://wp.me/p1UNyO-1E.
Thanks for the inspiration!!
Writing this was a fun break from NaNoWriMo…..now back to the novel.
Thanks for joining us! I’ll be reading all of the ones I’ve missed when I get home tonight
here’s mine http://sheilaghlee.blogspot.com/2011/11/nuclear-winter.html
Okay, I am finally going to get a chance to start reading these stories!
A little about the characters in mine. Isa is the Norse word for the rune represented by a straight perpendicular line. It means ‘Ice’. The qualities it invokes is stagnation, stasis, unchanging. Nied is the rune with a line dissecting the upper half of a nearly perpendicular line, and it means ‘Need’. It’s about restraint and patience.
I love it when names have deeper meanings. That adds even more depth to your story, Madison.
Thanks for sharing this, as well.
OMG – Why can’t she movie? Very interesting!
Mine is here: http://dld.bz/ax2nn
She can’t move because she’s Isa (just posted the explanation below the last photo under my story, lol).
Going to read yours now
I hope you like my homage to Red Riding Hood. I was a having a horrible day and it’s nice to get my mind off of problems for a moment.
http://www.wakefieldmahon.com/run.html
I couldn’t find a reply/comment section on your page, so I’ll post here…
Great job (on the writing, and freaking me out).
Just watched an episode of “Grimm”, my new fave, and this ties in nicely. Thanks!
http://wp.me/p1MNJe-bf
Karen
Finally! I am to the end and heading off to read your story @WakefieldMahon
Thanks for joining us and I hope to see you here again next Friday too, even if it’s not a bad day.
I’m sorry! I had no internet yesterday — I post on Thursday night but couldn’t link up until today
http://thecolorlime.wordpress.com/2011/11/03/flash-fiction-frozen-100/
And wow, I love your story, Madison! Beautiful. xo
Hi Madison – I’m too late to be called a Friday Fictioneer this week, but I’ll post mine anyway. Interestingly, I never read anyone else’s until mine is done (that way I’m not influenced by somebody else’s impression of the photo prompt). In spite of that, it’s amazing how often we overlap in how a picture strikes us! My bit is also a little myth-based. Thanks for keeping this going – I look forward to it every week!
http://wp.me/p1MNJe-bf
Aww, Karen, we’ll still call you a Friday Fictioneer, lol, and The Lime, too. I love doing the Fictioneers thing because it helps on so many levels – we get blog visitors, we get feedback, and I don’t know about everyone else, but I get a regular supply of story-starters with my own flashes.
I don’t read them either until after I’ve posted mine and it always seems there is a lot of overlap in how we think. Always amazes me, even when I think I’m veering way off the ordinary path, LOL.
Going to read yours now.
I love how you convey emotion, Madison! I was panicking before “Come” and then my brain raced to “What the heck is going on?”
Here’s mine, a day late, like always, lol. http://whitneycarter.wordpress.com/2011/11/05/strange-tracks/
There’s less of a bottleneck when you post them on Saturday
Glad you liked mine
Going to read yours now…
Madison–You caught that jumpy feeling perfectly, uniquely. Love the last sentence. Look at the word “barrage” — I wondered if it implied a more predictable wash of sound and your flash takes place in a suspended moment punctuated by hard noise.
I’m adding mine late. Hope everyone understands! (Can’t abandon goals because forty-eight hours have disappeared.)
Robin
My post:
http://robinhawke.wordpress.com/2011/11/06/quarantine/
Good point Robin. Thanks – I think you’re right about that. At some point it does become a barrage, but at that point it is irregular. I’ll go to read yours now – and I don’t think anyone minds when we get late additions